Twice in one day have my people been slighted; only once are we saved.
First, there's that new season of Survivor coming around with the groups drawn on racial lines. I'd cheer for the multiracial group, but there isn't one, so we must not be considered people.
Second, Pluto is no longer a planet, just because it's tiny. There is NOTHING wrong with being tiny, but next week, scientists will vote on whether or not to allow those under five feet tall (153 cm) to be considered people.
Attention schoolteachers! There is a new way to get your kids to remember the order of the planets! Remember the old "My Very Exciting Mother Just Sent Us Nine Peanuts/Pickles/Presents/(insert plural noun that starts with P here)"? Now it's "My Very Exciting Mother Just Sent Us Nein." That was not a typo. It's German for "no" because is Pluto a planet? No! So now the kids will learn the order of the planets AND a foreign language! Huzzah!
( Invoking the words of E. B. White... )
On the bright side, at least the government now allows women to buy the morning-after pill without a prescription. Of course, it will lead to much more irresponsibility -- because, let's face it, this is America -- but at least it's there for people with genuine "oops..."es.
I bought a shirt.
That's all.
First, there's that new season of Survivor coming around with the groups drawn on racial lines. I'd cheer for the multiracial group, but there isn't one, so we must not be considered people.
Second, Pluto is no longer a planet, just because it's tiny. There is NOTHING wrong with being tiny, but next week, scientists will vote on whether or not to allow those under five feet tall (153 cm) to be considered people.
Attention schoolteachers! There is a new way to get your kids to remember the order of the planets! Remember the old "My Very Exciting Mother Just Sent Us Nine Peanuts/Pickles/Presents/(insert plural noun that starts with P here)"? Now it's "My Very Exciting Mother Just Sent Us Nein." That was not a typo. It's German for "no" because is Pluto a planet? No! So now the kids will learn the order of the planets AND a foreign language! Huzzah!
( Invoking the words of E. B. White... )
On the bright side, at least the government now allows women to buy the morning-after pill without a prescription. Of course, it will lead to much more irresponsibility -- because, let's face it, this is America -- but at least it's there for people with genuine "oops..."es.
I bought a shirt.
That's all.